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# He's an a**hole but I'd like to work with him
- URL: https://www.jeffsu.org/hes-an-a-hole-but-i-would-want-to-work-with-him/
- Published: 2023-01-29T10:30:24.000Z
- Updated: 2024-07-24T12:30:12.000Z
- Author: Jeff
- Tags: Career, Growth

Hey friends, just wanted to give you a quick heads up that today’s edition of The Debrief is a bit controversial.

It reflects my true feelings on a somewhat serious matter but I would love to hear your honest opinions since I can definitely be a little narrow-minded at times.

## Onto the debrief

My first month into Google, I met a colleague - let’s call her Claire - that I **did not** vibe with.

The few times we interacted outside of the workplace, I felt she was self-centered, rude, and clique-y (i.e “I only want to hang out with a select few people I deem good enough”)

But. If you were to ask me today:

> Jeff, there’s a huge project that needs to succeed, and your next promotion depends on it. Who would you want on your team?

I would answer - without hesitation - Claire.

Claire is only 1 year older than me but I am not ashamed to admit that her ability to get things done is on a completely different level.

When faced with an unprecedented issue, she’s able to quickly identify key points and corresponding implications by asking thoughtful questions (using her version of [the management consulting framework](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lcRILuvAWgU&ref=jeffsu.org)).

Then, she executes at lightening speed and is not afraid to put in extra hours to achieve the objective.

### Which brings me to a controversial point

💡

The end always justifies the means

Imagine you were scolded and belittled by Claire for 3 months, but the project succeeds and you get promoted with a large raise, would you be okay with that?

What if you needed to get your child into a “good school” but the tradeoff was you had to do or tolerate something that made you feel uncomfortable?

“It depends on the individual person and situation” you might say, and I agree!

### You can probably see where I'm going with this

This might come as a surprise to some of you but I’m actually not that easy to work with.

I have high standards at work (I like to prioritize efficiency above all else), and I tend to hold my colleagues to those same standards (which is very unfair).

But I would try to justify my actions with: “Well if the end result is positive, then it’s fine right?”

Put another way, should I take it as a compliment if my colleagues say, “Jeff can be an asshole, but yea if push comes to shove, I’d definitely trust him to get the job done."

A lot of my peers would say “Heck no. The ‘how’ matters just as much as the ‘what.’”

And a lot of companies (especially in tech) would specifically look at **how** employees achieve their goals during the performance review process (e.g. how would cross-functional colleagues rate working with you?)

I'm sure there are good arguments for both sides and there's no "right" answer. And I'm also sure my perspective will change as I continue to grow personally and professionally. 

I'll keep you all updated.

[In the meantime, let me know what you think!](https://www.jeffsu.org/hes-an-a-hole-but-i-would-want-to-work-with-him/#ghost-comments-root)

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